The Home Front

"Her head would be nice, from the shoulders up, so that the EGO implant in her neck would be there as well!" Marcel could hear the pleasure in the hooded man's voice as he contemplated the request, then he continued, "But you may keep the silver platter. You may contact me through Varus to arrange the delivery when the deed is done. We are willing to pay a million scrip now, but know if you renege on this deal, you will never work in this area again. We may not know where to find you, but we can find Varus, and he controls all crime in this area. Oh, and we will find you too eventually, as we have connections across the world, and our reunion will be anything but sweet. So, what do you say: Yea or nay?"

Once Amber returned to her post in Erika Widowmaker's EGO, Erika entered the interrogation room with Kaj, seeing an obviously frightened Lena Marr sitting on the opposite side of the interrogation table, shackled to her chair with two heavily armed security guards standing on either side of her. Erika sat down opposite Lena, with Kaj standing with arms folded behind Erika. Erika knew this was probably hard on Kaj, given his romantic relationship with the prisoner, but felt his presence might rattle Lena into revealing more than she would otherwise and for the fact that as a huge Bio-man, his intimidation factor could not be underestimated.

Erika tented her long clay red fingers looking intently at Lena with wide jade eyes as her EGO telecast the interview to Atticus, Belle, and Volodja, asking a simple question on its face, "Why do it Lena? Why?"

Lena's sky blue eyes grew as wide as Erika's, white tears began to stream down her chalk white face as she leaned forward in her chair and she replied in a scared voice, "You don't understand, they have my sickly mother a prisoner in the Collective Capital City! If I didn't do as they say, they would kill her in the most horrible way possible!"

Erika raised a purple eyebrow saying in a flat tone, "You forget that when I hired you initially I did a thorough investigation of you. You have no living family, and grew up in an orphanage in Lima. Want to try again? Why?"

Lena leaned back in her chair, the tears stopping as if faucet had been turned off, crossing her shapely legs as a cold smile crossed her pretty face, her sky blue eyes grew narrow as she answered sardonically, "Well, you got me there! However, if you really had done your research, you would have known that the orphanage was really a brothel and I had my first John at age five. By eight, I realized I could make more money by robbing the Johns, and by ten I killed my first rich John in a stinking ally. Oh, don't look at me that way, I don't need your pitying looks, that life made me tough and smart enough to live in the real world, not in the make-believe world you do-gooders have created in your own minds. The sheep will always be sheep, and the only way things will change for a sheep is when they learn to grow canine teeth. I grew fangs early, and that's how I've survived this long!"

Erika looked sympathetically, and asked again, "Why then Lena?"

Lena shrugged her slim shoulders, then opened her eyes wide, as she said with sincerity, "Scrip of course. It's always about the scrip! There are those in the Collective who would just love to see your little reading club broken into little bitty pieces, and they are willing to pay big to have it done. If I had succeeded, I would have been set for life, living a life of luxury in my own hacienda in Lima. Doesn't matter, I would have probably been bored within a week of living such a life, and I already outlived everybody I knew at the orphanage." Then Lena added angrily, "Quit looking at me that way Erika. This isn't a boo-hoo story, but the story of a survivor that finally ran out of luck. I had a good run, but I know Atticus will kill me as soon as he gets here no matter what, because I almost killed his beloved. I'd do the same thing if I was him, so no hard feelings. As I said, I had a good run, and I'm ready for it to end, because even if I do escape, Governor Skarr will make sure I don't live long, for he tends to punish failure severely. Atticus will at least probably torture me before killing me - I know the Harbinger of Death's reputation - so I'll still live longer than if I escape."

Lena laughed bitterly, saying, "Jokes on him! I've loved Sadomasochism since I was a child!"

Erika shook her head looking down at her own hands, then looked up grimly querying, "Why didn't Governor Skarr punish you after your first failure?"

"Because I never failed!" Lena answered with a wicked grin on her lush alabaster lips, "I played you all for fools from the beginning! You thought I was an inept spy for Governor Skarr, then turned a spy for you, and now you find I was always on Governor Skarr's payroll.  I guess that makes me a triple spy! I'm really, really good at it, because not only did I gather intelligence without you detecting me from your computers, but also from your people. Amazing how certain South American herbs, mixed with a little alcohol and a little tension releasing sex will loosen both inhibitions when they are awake and tongues when they are asleep! Worked with both Chloe and Kaj, as well as less important base personnel. I can give you a list if you wish - Oh, Kaj, you were the best lay of them all, but you need to avoid the human poetry. You can bore a girl to tears with that schakto! Stay with the old push-shove! You are really good at that!"

"Since you are being so straight forward, what was Governor's plan here?" Erika inquired.

"Since I think I've cashed my last paycheck, I don't see any harm in telling you," Lena folded her arms tightly, looking at Kaj with her sky blue eyes, speaking more to Kaj than Erika, "Originally it was all about gaining your trust and keeping tabs on you, finding out and reporting everything about your operations and this base's logistics. I didn't ask why as long as the checks cleared, and it was a adrenalin high playing the game of make believe. Once, with you Kaj, I almost believed it was real, but... well it wasn't and never could be! Life after the Apocalypse is never happily ever after, it's just waiting game until the next Apocalypse." 

"When did the job become one of assassination instead of spying?" Asked Erika calmly.

"When your son was brought here. Don't know why, but Skarr considers Senator Cael a threat. So I tinkered with the security devices around the infirmary, made myself up like the Casti nurse, and let him and his crazy sister loose. You guys were supposed to kiil them, but you didn't." Lena  shrugged again, glancing back at Erika, "Sometimes a plan doesn't come out the way it's supposed to, but that enhances the adrenalin high of being almost caught. I thought for sure everyone would suspect me with my security clearance and my background, but you didn't, so I just kept playing the part of the inept but sweet girlfriend of Kaj the scary bio-man, and I was left alone. Then recently, I got orders to change targets to Belle but to separate Belle from the team rather than killing her, and again you put me in the perfect position to do so. For some reason, they didn't want me to kill Belle, maybe because they thought I couldn't, just have her thrown off the team. I think it would have been easier for me to kill her, but that wasn't what I was paid to do. Then I got the order to kill Lady, and not be subtle about it. Don't know why, didn't ask. So I used Belle as a diversion, hoping I could do both jobs and earn both paychecks, then get away scott-free. Hope is a poor strategy. As you know, it didn't work out that way, but I knew sooner or later I would get caught and killed, if not this job than another! It actually happened later than I expected in my life."

Erika stood up, "Thank you Lena for your frankness. I may have additional questions later."

Erika walked out of the interrogation room stiffly all the way to her quarters, then sat on the edge of her bed, bowing her head and holding it in both hands as she held her jade eyes closed tightly. Erika didn't weep, because she lost that ability after weeping long and hard for her infant daughter and beloved husband when they died on the same day, but she thought if she could weep, she would weep for Lena Marr and the displaced Votans like her who had lost all hope after the Pale Wars. 

  

Once her mother laid back and fell asleep, Amber sneaked out of the safe recesses of her mother's EGO, and appeared in Atticus's EGO next to Dinara's bed. She saw Dinara finally was asleep, and thought about leaving, but couldn't take her jade eyes off the young sleeping beauty. She thought of just using her EGO powers to just change into pajamas, but on a whim, she just took off her outer clothes, crawling next Dinara dressed merely in her underwear. As Amber spooned the smaller girl, she reveled in Dinara's warmth and her sweet scent, as she too slowly fell asleep.

"You are right, Tinkerbelle," replied Volodja. "If I put my personal quarrel with her aside, and that is not easy thing to do, then I must say that she deserves a fair trial. And we might need more information from her. Just be careful around her, please. I still feel kind of weak to get up and start another rescue operation. And if Orion catches me breaking his hellish bed regime again, he will amputate my legs, I am afraid, just to make sure that I stay in bed."

After Belle left Volodja sat in his hospital bed, fallen deeply into thoughts. Lena's story was full of possible lies, mixed with half truths, but it contained a lot of truth as well. All what he just heard, needed confirmation yet, but if she's background is true, Volodja could understand her motives. Volodja knew lot of about survival - it was his way of life most of the time, but unlike Lena, there were certain borders for him, he didn't crossed - he didn't extend his existence at cost of life of innocents or bystanders, as a first thing. It was his choice, because he still hoped for better life for everyone, but was willing to pay for it himself, not letting others do it.

Partly he had to blame those books, he read, because they widened his horizon of knowledge and told about new possibilities and made him see problems from different angles. And not only books, because life in chaotic Europe, where everyone had their own truth to follow, offered that opportunity too, if you opened your eyes to see a bigger picture and made choices, which could be right or wrong ones, but you got to choose lot of the time, instead of making one choice and live with that for the rest of your life.

And his inner guardian was one to blame too, because he kept Volodja on the side of light most of the time, instead of letting him vanish amidst the shadows. Volodja always had at least a little hope left, hidden deeply in his soul, so he didn't got stuck to a mere survival, like that unfortunate Lena did. For her survival seemed to be a main purpose, not just a step before taking next one. Volodja always wanted something more, although he didn't believed, that he will ever achieve it. But now his hope was not in vain. He got his chance and he was using it. Lena missed her chance - she was accepted here and she had a chance to have a normal social and love life, but still she thought only about her own survival, instead of thinking wider when she was offered an opportunity.

Lena represented one way to adapt the world, but it was not the only way. Volodja had a way of his own. Sandy had a clear vision of a soldier and protector and (Volodja hoped he was right about that) adorable girl, who can open her eyes to see the beauty and love, because she wants to see it, after meeting Volodja. Poor Belle was much stronger than Lena and saw the world as the best possible one, when she was her usual optimistic self, although she went through a lot. Atticus learned to adapt the whole new world for him, because he was changed man, after he could choose his way of life and unlike Lena, he seized that opportunity. Lady...Her life had changed too and she became more and more visible in new environment after being ignored and harassed. And Erika learns to adapt a new life style too, as long as she wants.

Nobody could not prefer one way to another. Everybody got to choose suitable one. Only Lena seemed to be lost, blind or too afraid to make a choice. And her lack of vision almost cost to Volodja life of his beloved Sandy, his close friend and confident Sophie and his friend and former student Lady and caused MOM to sacrifice herself, but he can't take it personally, but must stay neutral, although it was really hard. But his at least partly correct observations and suggestions helped others to reveal Lena as a spy and drag her into bright daylight, so she can't act secretly any more...

Volodja needed a distraction too, because at moment he was a bed ridden and if he keep thinking, he might ruin his somewhat good mood, needed for fixing his wounds quicker and getting away from "evil" Dr. Orion. Positive thinking increases chances of healing at faster rate and since Sophie already had some rest, she worked on his pierced hand at double speed. All Volodja had to do was wait quietly and only way he can spend his time, was reading again. "In omnibus requiem quaesivi, et nusquam inveni nisi in angulo cum libro ("Everywhere I have searched for peace and nowhere found it, except in a corner with a book.") said medieval theologian Thomas à Kempis and Volodja agreed with him completely. He knew that reading and writing and his field trips helped him to survive several emotional crisis's lately and now it could help him getting back to his feet faster too. He just needs stepping out from everyday's worries for awhile and keep his mind occupied, but since he could not visit the virtual world or write, he just had to read...

"So Chloe, y'all are on duty?" Asked Belle from the brig from her encrypted hailer. She wasn't sure how much Lena had compromised both the base's security and communications systems, so when in doubt, go low tech - or at least lower tech!

"Yes, Erika asked me to take my shift a little early. Crikey, she sounded exhausted." Chloe sounded concerned, then added with her usual panache, "This is a fine shit house we find ourselves in, isn't it my little fuck muppet? Most of the A-team in the infirmary, not good at all! Glad you're back on duty, and so are most of the base personnel."

"Really appreciate y'all saying that Chloe," Answered Belle sadly, "But I know most of them are now scared stiff of me after my recent Volge-outs! I can see it in their eyes, darn it!"

"Not as much as you think!" Reassured Chloe, "You're more loved here then you know - you're the pleasant face of the Team, the one that always causes them to collectively smile when you enter the room, who knows them all by name, and asks about each of them like you care, which everybody knows you do! Wolfram is helping them to remember that, and love will always trump fear."

Belle laughed, a delightful sound to all that heard it, then replied, "When did you become such a romantic Chloe?"

"Get back to work you bludger you! Chloe out!" Said Chloe in mock anger before signing out.

Belle turned to Kaj, the huge Bio-man head of base security and who had been their prisoner's lover, seeing the hurt in his eyes, so asking, "Are y'all going to be okay, Kaj? I can stay and help you guard Lena, but I would really like to get back and check on the others in the infirmary - "

"I will be fine Miss Starr! I know my job!" Interrupted Kaj curtly.

Belle had told Kaj to call her Belle many times, but this wasn't the time to remind him, so she ignored that fact and said before leaving for the infirmary, "No one doubts that big guy! No one! Okey dokey then, I'm off to the infirmary! Let me know if you need me for anything!"

As Belle sashayed out of the brig, the two human security guards there watched her every step and smiled. Belle was never aware of how beautiful a woman she had become at twenty-two, still thinking of herself as the gangly teen ager she was when she arrived in the Bay Area, but all others were, particularly those of the male gender. Except Kaj, whose thought had always been of one woman, the one presently locked in the brig. He stared at Lena from his desk in the brig, watching the young Castithan woman as she lay on the cot in her brig cell, staring at the ceiling with sky blue eyes focused on nothing but her private thoughts, her arms that held him just the night before crossed behind her lovely head.

"If you got anything to say to me Kaj, just say it," Said Lena without looking at him.

 

Volodja was slightly amused of the sight of Dr. Orions short and plump figure dragging tall and thin Wolfram von Eschen behind him, but smile vanished from his handsome face right after Belle alerted him about Lady and her memory loss. He wiped to Wolfram, asking him getting closer to his bed and they started to discuss about Lady and her mental disorder right away. Volodja begun:

"I would say that Lady suffers from some form of retrograde amnesia, if Belle's assumptions about psychogenic amnesia are correct. Her symptoms refer to retrograde amnesia, but pure retrograde amnesia is considered to be very rare. We should start with more specific diagnosis. Is her amnesia dissociative or organic one? The primary symptom of dissociative amnesia is the sudden inability to remember past experiences or personal information. At moment she has a huge memory gap between her older memories and most recent ones. Recent memories are less likely to be recovered at moment, but older memories will be easier to recall, because they are strengthened over time. That's why Lady remembers joining the clan and Belle as her sponsor, but I am more than sure that her current disorder is caused by latest event in her cabin, where she almost lost her life. Organic amnesia is usually caused by head trauma, substance abuse, or epilepsy and according to our good Dr. Orion, Lady had a head trauma. But Sandy says that it's fixed already, so reasons must be psychological ones, because Lady seems to be trying to escape the memory of that distressing and frightening event."

"Volodja, mein freund. I would put my money on assumption that her memory loss is caused by that traumatic event, as you mentioned. That would save us lot of time and we don't have to deal with half truths, when we use hypnosis or barbiturates to stimulate her to remember what might caused it. And I am not sure that we have barbiturates at our disposal any more. Forced memories are not always very truthful anyway. But at moment we are discussing about obvious. Welche Beweise brauchen wir denn noch? What more evidence do we need?" replied Wolfram, ending his with question.

Volodja thought a bit: "Agreed at moment, but what can we do to help her? Some patients may spontaneously recover from amnesia and no treatment won't be required at all, but we can't afford waiting for that to happen, because of certain Giant who may get really restless. If it's about that trauma, then what will be our options to increase her recovery speed? Usual methods involve recreating that traumatic event, as long as I know. Roughly speaking, if we can cure her from that trauma, she has no reason to deny it any more and she could gain her memory back. But we need know what exactly happened there, so we must speak with Lady and....Sandy too. Maybe she can dig out Lady's memories."

"Jawohl, Volodja. It seems to be really cruel approach, but it is most effective one. And we have several options here as long as we know, what happened with Lady in that cabin. We will discuss them later when we are able to reconstruct those traumatic events. First we must talk with our junge patient and find out what she remembers about what happened, if she remembers anything at all. This is so complicated - we need her memories to know what happened and we need to know what happened to regain her memories. Scheißkerl!"

"More than agreed. Then we can be really sure about everything and it gives me valid reason to get out from this damned bed at last!" said Volodja enthusiastically. And he jumped out from his hospital bed and rushed by Lady's bed to talk with her and to see his girl Sandy and he was not sure which he wanted to do most. Helping Lady was his duty as a friend, but his heart told him that seeing Sandy is most important thing for him.

"Hello," he greeted Lady after they arrived. Volodja first and Wolfram right after him."If I am correct then you don't know me yet. I am Volodja Uljanov, your future friend and this is my old friend Wolfram. Can we speak with you Lady?"

"Lady, do you know anything, what happened to you? Anything at all?" asked Wolfram, while Volodja established contact with Sandy through EGO link and asked her to try to dig out Lady's hidden memories events in her cabin, if possible. If not, then they had to think some more. At moment they had psychogenic amnesia and conversion disorder to deal with, and as long as Volodja knew, then they needed exact information about what was happened, to be able to help Lady. If Lady or Sandy can't provide them with info, then they need to make Lena to speak the truth about what happened. Another problem was to find suitable treatment, because Lady's blindness made any visual therapy method useless.